Growing Up and Growing Out

Things I've grown out of:

Television. I don't think I need to explain.

Star Wars. I was a huge Star Wars fan in my late teens and early twenties. When my sister gave me Star Wars pajamas one recent Christmas, I didn't have the heart to tell her that I now find it greatly unappealing. The original series was better for adults; the newer movies are totally sold-out to the kids. Either way, my days of fandom about anything are over.

Peanut Butter. Please, let's move beyond peanut butter. We're grownups now. There are other better butters out there- almond, sunflower seed, cashew, tahini. They are usually less processed/adulterated, and may be healthier than peanut butter. And really, peanuts are not real nuts. And there are also better ways of making a sandwich than using any nut butter and sugary jam. There's hummus, aioli, tabbouleh. And there are better (read: more grownup) foods out there than sandwiches!

Wearing lots of makeup. I understand everyone's style and priorities are different, but for me, wearing lots and lots of makeup was my childish way of dealing with severe insecurity brought on by teasing from peers early on. Until I reached about twenty, I thought I was ugly without makeup. 

Rock music. I really truly believe that the majority of rock music is adolescent. I thought it was cool when I was a teen. Then I discovered classical, jazz, and world music. There are some really good rock songs, particularly older ones (1999 and on back), but in general, I feel that the genre is too noisy, petulant and self-important. Exceptions are there, but you have to hunt for them.

Drinking soda. I may have one every now and again, especially while traveling or among family (who chug it like there's no tomorrow), but I'm really over it. Besides knowing the health risks, I truly prefer tea, kombucha, coconut water, plain water, the occasional juice. Soda is overrated, unhealthy and a waste of resources.

Things I've grown into: 

Taking care of my health. Being seemingly impervious to the weight gain that the rest of my family is burdened with, I thought I could just do whatever the heck I want and be totally fine. There is such a thing as "skinny fat." I had/have thyroid issues, crazy acne, mental health problems, severe anxiety, low energy (but still "wired"), insomnia, low muscle tone, and upper back pain. Now I do my best to eat real food, get real sun, exercise physically and mentally, and avoid toxins as much as possible.

Making my own things. This one is related to the health issue, but also it's an economic and self-fulfillment issue. I don't make everything, of course, but I'm trying to make as much as my little peabrain can figure out. Toothpaste, deodorant, herbal remedies, sunblock, lip balm, lotion, salad dressing, cloth napkins, cleaning cloths (to replace paper towels), and greeting cards. I used to knit, but haven't in years. I never got past the basic knit stitch. But my husband has a beautiful scarf to prove my past effort. Making things brings a new appreciation and joy to my home life and saves us some dollars. Plus it engages the creative and tactile senses.

Silence. I used to marvel at the fact that my aunt always drives without music. How could she, I thought! Well, I have discovered that the older I get, the less noise I want around me. Maybe it's a maturity thing, too. I like the sound of my own thoughts figuring themselves out. I like listening for the voice of God. I don't need constant auditory input to fill any emptiness inside me. I'm content without it. I love music, but I don't need it constantly. Same with chatter.

Radio. I loved listening to the radio as a youth but I eventually traded it for MTV and CD's. Once again I am rediscovering the peaceful, passive pastime of listening to the radio. I like to hear the DJ's talk about the music and local events. I like to hear musician interviews and live in-studio performances. I like to hear talks and literature readings. I like to hear A Prairie Home Companion. Notice that I'm not listening to the top 40 stations. You won't hear DJ's on commercialized stations talk about the quality of the music, or interview local musicians, or really do any local anything. My dad regaled me with stories about his old radio shows from the 30's and 40's. If you look hard enough, you can still find good old fashioned radio.


Spending time in nature. This is also health-related, mostly mental health, but it's also just nice to get to know your local parks and wildlife. I recently read that doctors in my area are prescribing and facilitating park excursions for patients in low-income neighborhoods. Fantastic. It's really true that 90% of the people you see in the regional parks are affluent whites. Anyway, whether it's a trip to the hills, a hike in the woods, or a walk to the Marina Park, I try to get some nature in everyday. My mom would be proud; she could never get me to come out and dig in the garden with her, much less venture into a park.

Talking to people who aren't in my circle. This is easier to do when you're a pedestrian out and about in the community, which is also good for your health! But it's been good to expand my horizons by talking with others. I've talked to many elders, people from other countries, other cultures, and other religions. Even taking the time to talk with shopkeepers, farmers at the market, and other vendors is enriching. So many people go about their day only talking to their immediate family and tight circle of friends. They barely give the person behind the coffee bar the time of day. I feel blessed by the diversity of my community, and blessed by the conversations I've had.