Slowing Down

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Take time to stop and smell the roses. Or the lavender. Or the pizza. Wherever you are, slow down and give thanks for the beauty of God's creation. Really experience it. This is what I'm telling myself this weekend. It's been a busy, noisy time for me over the last several weeks. Most of the time, the noise is only in my head; my flurry of thoughts and frantic notations of endless minutiae. I believe that God created us to walk the earth at a reasonable, steady pace. The world's hurried and inconsistent pace is, unfortunately, the speed I've been taking these days. Part of it of course is how unsettled I feel. Accordingly, how much I crave feeling settled has determined my mad rush to set things aright. What happened to my focus on gentleness, hmm? 

Patience is a virtue I thought I'd mastered. Clearly I hadn't. In the last month, I've started a new and vastly unfamiliar job, moved from one little home into another, and started driving again for the first time in the last six years. The last two will require very, very large monthly payments, the likes of which I've never paid before, and just looking at the numbers is a shock for me. Grateful as I am that my new and vastly unfamiliar job can pay for these things, I'm in awe of the responsibility. And of course, I'm still struggling to reconcile my beliefs with the requirements of my job, and the fact that I'm working outside the home at all. I'm painfully aware that we wouldn't need the new car if I didn't have the job, and so this payment isn't that necessary; however, I can't get to the job without it and without the job, we'd have no home. My husband's job doesn't yet cover all our needs, though I believe in time it will. 

In any event, all this has been swirling about in my little brain and causing all kinds of distress within me. Yes, I know, I let it. When I stop rushing madly, like today, I can marvel at the beauty of the red and gold leaves of autumn trees, and appreciate the abundance of lavender growing all over my town, and have blessed conversations with strangers whom God puts in my path. Then I am poised to reflect on Him and His goodness. And then it hits me- all this "stuff" is His to handle. I'm just the hands and feet walking the earth for Him. The aforementioned strangers were so wise and filled with God's Spirit, that I wonder if they weren't angels. I'm mostly kidding. You never know.

A dear friend called me today too, and it was so good to speak with her. Another old, old friend sent me a text as well, and I hadn't heard from either dear lady in such a while. Why am I so awful about keeping in touch with people? It's a wonder my friends don't throw up their hands and desert me. I jest, but really, I am quite terrible. Oh, I can feel it coming on... the temptation to pile on more "notes to self" about what to improve and remember, such as "keep in closer contact with friends X, Y and Z."  Any time we sit and reflect in this way, we take that risk, I suppose. The reason so many of us are in this state of distress, especially coming upon the holiday season, is because we've got too many mental memos labeled URGENT. Whatever shall we do?

Only one thing is needed: 

41 “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, 42 but few things are needed—or indeed only one.[a] Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” 
-Luke 10: 41-42